I was just reading a part in one of my favorite books “The Journey of Desire” and it was a bit about sorrow and aching that we all walk around with…but that we spend most of our time ignoring. He asked me the question, “What is the voice of my ache saying to me?” Good one. I spent some time journaling what I’m sad about, or what has brought me pain and sorrow. Most of mine revolves around XXXXXXXXXX (sorry!). It’s interesting to acknowledge sadness. I don’t know if we give ourselves enough opportunity to just be & feel human.
I want to explore what it’s like to feel and know pain, sadness, sorrow, grief, the longing…to not feel like I have to to run or flee from it…to escape it. I wonder if its goal is to actually to reveal the truth to me, and instead, I revel in cosmetic emotional surgery – this’ll fix it! this’ll make me feel better! And then I get addicted to a string of adrenaline-inducing pleasures, and I miss out on actually knowing myself.
I believe that underneath all my busy-ness and self-imposed distractions, there is the peace, hope, joy and truth that I’m ultimately longing for…and my desires – mostly the unrequited ones, and the sadness, are my compass to lead me there.